Miles To go
by Cindy aka SG1PhileShipper
Summary: Scully can't come to terms with Melissa's death, when they are out on a similar case


By: Cindy Vandenplas  
Date: August 23rd 1998  
  
  
Miles To Go Before I Sleep (1/1)  
By Cindy  
  
  
Hello you all. I'm new to this; so don't shoot the writer straight away. I wrote this story a couple of years ago and I found it back by accident today. I read it and I thought it would suit our characters very well. Especially after seeing the movie yesterday. Don't sue me for not having it seen yet, but I'm from Belgium and I went all the way to Germany to see it. It's due to be out in Belgium on October 14th and that's still long time. And well, I absolutely loved the movie. It was so romantic and I am left with some unfinished business. So Chris should better come out with something next year, or I will have to shoot myself in the foot again... Just kidding... I guess if now he still denies the strong love between our heroes, I will kick myself. And not acting upon it, well that's not possible for me anymore. But hey, we're used to that.  
  
Rating: I have no idea, but I'll give it a PG to be certain. No violence, no sex, no bad language, just a lot of MSR.  
  
Classification: A, R (Mulder/Scully)  
  
Keywords: Romance, tenderness, friendship and love.  
  
Spoilers: All the way up to season five.  
  
Disclaimer: Hey, they're mine. Oh no, wait, my dog just came in telling me they belong to Chris Carter (the man with the golden brain and the golden hands), 1013 Productions and the FOX Network. I'm just taking them out for a spin, a little romance and I promise to return them after they have kissed. So please, no need to sue me. I haven't got anything you could use (except my sick little mind) and I'm in denial anyway...   
  
Second Disclaimer: I borrowed the song ''Miles To Go Before I Sleep'' from Celine Dion's fabulous album ''Let's Talk About Love''. So go and buy it... I love Celine and that song would fit our characters perfectly. Please don't sue me about that...  
  
Summary: Scully can't come to terms with Melissa's death, when they are out on a similar case.   
  
Dedication: Thanks to the fabulous portrayal of David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson, we have something to do on lonely nights. I haven't got a life, so I have a lot of lonely nights. Anyway, I dedicate this to all the shippers out there, cause their stories keep me going.  
  
Feedback: Yes please. Could you drop me a line if you read this by accident and let me know what you think. Good or back, I don't care. That way I will know if I should continue writing.   
  
  
WARNING ALERT: IF YOU BELONG TO THOSE BUNCH OF CRAZY PEOPLE WHOM  
BELIEVE MULDER AND SCULLY DON'T BELONG TOGETHER, YOU SHOULD RUN  
AWAY AS FAR AS YOU CAN. THIS STORY IS FULL OF GLUE, IF YOU GET THE   
PICTURE. AND YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
And now let's get the story on the road.........  
  
  
  
Miles To Go Before I Sleep (1/1)  
By Cindy Vandenplas  
  
  
Mulder watched Scully as she walked off. He had really messed up this one, with his crazy theory. He knew that after four years the death of her sister was still affecting her more than she was willing to admit. And it was also in a couple of day that she would be reminded of it, as it was then officially four years ago she had died. And this case was so similar to Melissa's death, that even Mulder thought it was spooky. He wanted to let her time to come to terms with it, but it seemed she couldn't handle it. Mulder hoped she would still speak to him, especially after what he said. He had been such an insensitive jerk. He could still remember her face when he had said:' There's nothing you can do to bring her back.'' If she didn't know that already. And now he should apologize to her. That was if she was still listening to him. Mulder had realized that nothing was forever in this world, not even a partnership. But he hoped friendship was. For some strange reason he couldn't explain, Scully had become the most important person in his life. He screwed up everything. He let someone take Samantha away from him, he let those bastards kill his father and Melissa, he had let them take Scully and then he hadn't done anything when those same people had given her cancer. And he probably ruined their friendship with his big mouth. He should speak to her before it was too late.  
  
Mulder looked at the stars as if they were going to give him an answer. It was a peaceful night in June. Although it was pretty cold for that time of the year. He was glad he wore his jacket. He paced around the motel's garden for a while and then decided to go back to his room. He went by Scully's room and saw that there was no light inside. He softly knocked on the door, but no one answered. Gently he opened it and saw her tiny body lying on the bed, face buried in the pillow. Mulder went towards the bed and sat down on it. He put his hand on Scully's back and used his other hand to turn her around. Her eyes were closed, but he could see she had been crying. Like always, she was trying to hide her tears for him. He hated it when she did that...  
  
Mulder put her pillow straight and made her sit against it. She had opened her eyes and stared at the ceiling:  
  
''Scully.....'' he softly spoke. He turned her head in his direction. She met his gaze, but didn't say a word. Mulder stood up and walked around the room again. He came back to sit on the bed:  
  
''I'm sorry, Scully. I shouldn't have said what I did, but you know I was right.'' As he blurted out those words, he realized he should kick himself. Again...  
  
Scully turned her back towards Mulder. He got around the bed and sat down on the floor in front of her. He even kneeled for her....  
  
''Look, Scully, apologizing is not what I do best and this phrase is the best way to prove it. What I'm trying to say is that I'm really sorry. And I need your help on this one. You have to keep me in line here. I need my skeptic partner back again. That's why I said what I did. You can't run around hoping Melissa will   
come back some day. I did the same thing with Samantha and look what I've become. I hate myself, people hate my guts and I run around chasing ghosts and little gray man. You can't do that Scully, it's not human. Stop chasing ghosts. If you do stop it, I will do that to. Together we'll find the answers to our questions.''  
  
Mulder put his hand on Scully's. She met his gaze again, but this time he realized she had understood what he had just said. He got up from the floor and sat down next to her:  
  
''You okay, Scully?''  
''Better. Thanks Mulder. Your little speech made me realize how much I was becoming like you. Chasing shadows and memories. But I know I have to move on.''  
''Look, we both went through a lot lately. And obviously there's a lot more to come. I need someone by my side with both feet on the ground.''  
''That sounds just like me...''  
''That's why you are the smart one and I am the spooky one.''  
''About what you said Mulder, will you stop chasing gray men and conspiracies?''  
''I'll try, but I could never stop my search for Samantha. And I'm counting on you to help me.''  
''Sure partner.''  
  
For the first time in a long while, Mulder saw that famous Scully-smile again. Oh God, he loved that smile so much. And he realized how much he missed her smile:  
  
''What Mulder?''  
''It's just that...''  
''What?''  
''It's great to see you smile again. Especially after everything you went through.''  
''There's something more to it, Mulder. Spill the beans...''  
''You think I would lie to you?''  
''Are you?''  
''I am. I thought you would never speak to me again. Especially after I was so mean to you.''  
''You're not mean, Mulder. You're a softy.''  
''I AM a softy? You think I can't be mean?''  
''Can you Mulder?''  
  
Scully got off the bed, but Mulder pushed her back on it. She started laughing out loud:  
  
''Is that being mean, Mulder?''  
''You wanna play it rough, do you?''  
  
Mulder let himself fall on the bed next to Scully. He took a pillow and pushed it in her face. She tried to fight him, but he was so much stronger than her. After a while, he let her go. He laid his head on one of his arms and looked her straight in the eyes. She smiled:  
  
''I didn't know you were such a hot shot, Mulder....''  
''There so much more you don't know about me.''  
  
He looked her deep in the eyes and laid his hand on her cheek, making small circles with his thumb:  
  
''One more thing, Scully...''  
  
Scully put a finger on Scully mouth. He took her hand and kept looking at her:  
  
''What are we gonna do, Scully?''  
''If we stay like this, I know what will happen. Fox, I...''  
''Don't you ever call me Fox again Dana, or else...''  
''What?''  
  
Mulder ran his hand through Scully's hair and kissed her on the forehead. He put his hands behind her neck and looked in her eyes, losing himself in that deep pool of blue:  
  
''Dana, there's one more reason why I said what I did.''  
''What then?''  
''I told you that, because you had to realize it. I wanted to wake you up. And.... I hate to see you depressed. And it was all my fault....''  
''Mulder......"  
''Let me finish. I'm glad we work together, because you mean so much to me. More that I ever held for possible. That's why you should leave the x-files.''  
''But why Mulder?''  
''Because everyone close to me has been taken away. And if there's one person I don't wanna lose, it's certainly you. I'm sorry, but that's the way I feel.''  
''Can I speak now?''  
''Yeah....''  
''Remember when the x-files were closed down? We became strangers to each other and I don't want that to ever happen again. I couldn't work with anyone but you, even if I put my life in danger day and night.''  
''That's nice to say, Scully.''  
'' One more thing: I'd hate it if something happened to you too. But that's what we do. Out of all the jobs in the world, we picked this one. And I never thought I'd say this, but I enjoy working on the x-files.''  
''Why?''  
''Because it's great to hear your theories, to argue with you and to make you work for your answers. And I never get bored with you.''  
''I'm not boring then?''  
''Well, I didn't exactly say that...''  
''You want me to prove I'm not boring? Okay....''  
  
Mulder took Scully's hand and together they walked out of the room:  
  
''Mulder, what are you doing?''  
''Proving I'm not boring.''  
''Where are we going?''  
''You'll see...''  
  
Mulder still held Scully's hand and she thought they must have looked like lovesick teenagers, walking hand in hand. They walked to the garden:  
  
''Close your eyes, Scully.''  
''I need to see where I'm going....''  
''I'll guide you.''  
  
She closed her eyes and let Mulder guide her. He walked her to a beautiful fountain with colored lights around. He sat Scully down on a blanket and came to sit next to her. He hit the play-button on a tape recorder:  
  
I would walk to the edge of the universe for you  
Paint you a crimson sunset over sheltering skies  
I could learn all the world dialects for you  
Whisper sonnets in your ear, discovering truth  
I could never worship pagan gods around me  
I will only follow the path that leads me to you baby,   
always  
  
Every step I take for you   
I will always defend, never pretend  
That every breath I take for love  
I could never be wrong, the journey is long  
With miles to go before I sleep,  
Miles to go before I sleep  
  
Mulder turned to Scully:  
  
''You can open your eyes now.''  
  
She opened her eyes and stared at the fountain with an open mouth. Then she turned to Mulder:  
  
''Why did you do that, Mulder?''  
''After all you've been through, you deserved it.''  
''Thanks, it's lovely. And what if I had stayed mad at you?''  
''I knew you wouldn't.''  
''How?''  
''A hunch.....''  
  
She smiled at him:  
  
''Nobody ever did such a nice thing for me. You keep surprising me, Mulder.''  
''And there's still one surprise to come.''  
''Another one?''  
''Yes, and it may be the biggest of all surprises. I'm falling in love with a beautiful woman.''  
''I thought you weren't interested in women.''  
''That's what I said. But this one is really special to me.''  
''You keep fading like a flower, Mulder. Have you told her how you feel?''  
''I have, in a certain way.''  
  
With that, Mulder hit the play button again:  
  
I would carry the rock of Gibraltar just for you  
Lifted like a pebble from the beach to the skies  
I could build you a bridge that spans the ocean wide  
But the greatest gift I give you would be to stand by your   
side  
Some can criticize and sit in judgment of us  
But they can't take away the love that lives inside us   
always  
  
Every step I take for you  
I will always defend, never pretend  
That every breath I take for love  
I could never be wrong, the journey is long  
With miles to go, before I sleep  
Miles to go, before I sleep  
  
Mulder looked at her:  
  
''I don't know how she feels about me though.''  
''I'm sure she likes you, because you're a very sweet man.''  
''She does like me then, does she?''  
  
Their eyes met in their deepest souls and Mulder took one of Scully's hands. He laid the other hand on her arm and came closer to her. He stared at her for a while, leaving her time to back away. But she didn't. His mouth moved closer to hers and he brushed her lips with his. He went on like that for a while and suddenly he felt they both wanted the same thing. The playing was finished and Mulder captured Scully's mouth In a long and passionate kiss. They were exploring each other and neither of them didn't want to break the kiss. Mulder felt his world turning around and he never thought someone could make him feel this way. These deep emotions were new to him. Now he knew the meaning of true love. He gently broke the kiss, put his head on Scully's shoulder and looked in her eyes. They both had a million questions in their eyes, but this time they wouldn't look for an answer. Sometimes not knowing the answer was better. Mulder helped Scully up and hand in hand they went for a walk in the garden. They looked at the stars and at each other, hoping to find an answer. When Mulder took Scully in his arms, hugged her and gave her a tender kiss on the mouth, they both knew the answer they were looking for. And for the first time in their lives, they realized why everybody needed friendship.... and love...  
  
  
The End.  
  
  
It's finished. What do you ya think? Let me know at cindyvandenplas@hotmail.com 


End file.
